Reflection and choices

Even the best attitude can go awry under stress. My situation isn't ideal and has even now taken yet a few more twists that make me uncomfortable. It probably didn't help for me to be so sick feeling helpless. I gotta tell you that I haven't been that sick in at least four years. I'm still not back yet.

Jeez, I faced worse than this just last year right? It's just that it's been one thing after another non stop for the past two years. It would have been so easy to give in sooo long ago. I honestly don't know how I do keep going. Thanks for your words of encouragement Bron. They touched me.

I will try to put into words what has gone on this week over the weekend. I'm still sick and having to try to take care of stuff before and after work. I didn't even go to workshop tonight cause I'm wiped. I'm also feeling very vunerable and emotionally raw. I'm not even sure I have it all straight in my mind yet.

There is no being saved here so on I must go in search of the things that will give me peace. After all, despite the odds and badness, I am still standing.