Christmas tells the truth

I watched the movie Love Actually recently. I had never seen it before even though it is a movie from 2003. It was a very cute movie. In the middle of it I thought I would get very sad since I am not in a relationship or even see the hope of one but was not the case. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I recommend it to all to watch this holiday season. Let me know if you liked it.

One thing from the movie I liked was the theme throughout the movie. Christmas time is the time to tell the truth. I liked the idea a lot and it got me thinking. I always tell you how I'm feeling but I don't always have the time to elaborate on it. I will take the time now in the spirit of the movie.

Things did not really go the way I had planned for them to go this year. I was so optimistic and full of goals at the beginning of the year. I was going to conquer the world Diva style. I did not reach most of the goals I had for myself this year which is disappointing but I am proud of my forward fighting motion. Given the economy I'm really proud that I am still standing! So, I am still not permanently employed but (as usual) working on that. It is a little scary that I wont have the second job to save my bacon but I'm ever optimistic. Not sure how I'm going to pull this out of the new year's still down economy but I gotta keep going, right?

As for the dating. Hang on to your hats cause here comes a big roar of honesty. (I am a Leo) This has been a frustrating journey this year. The people I seem to be attracted to are already in a relationship, don't want to just date but want to be in love NOW or I got matched up on e-Harmony and cant figure out why. Let me just say I really hate e-Harmony. I know hate is a strong word but if the shoe fits. I find it a waste of (my Dad's) money. All of you out there that insisted I go with e-Harm vs Match.com I wont listen to you again on this point. Match may be a dating vs relationship site but I probably would have gone out on more than 2 dates. e-Harm seems to attract the desperate I want to be married now guys. I get the feeling that they don't want to try to get to know you but think once you are matched you just hook up and done. I was "matched" with several but most really did not spark my attention. Honestly I could not see why I was matched with most of them. (a member of a Harley gang that "typically spends his free time" on Harley rides, three wheeling and camping. Oh, he looked like a member of Zz Top) I really want to meet some folks that have a low drama meter and get to know them. It sounds simple enough but it has not worked out that way at all. I miss a lot about dating. The touching, silly text messages, getting dressed up to meet someone, talking for hours about everything and nothing, feeling my heart flutter when I see them coming down the street, the dreamy feeling of a first kiss with someone you are attracted to and so much more. I'm not sure why it has been so hard for me to meet someone but it is disappointing. I would love to get past the first date and feel the excitement of a second date.

So, that was my Christmas honesty. Maybe if I'm lucky the Christmas Fairy will grant my wish. Merry Christmas to all.