Few days out of Chemistry Dependency

I have had a few days for my head to clear from the intensity of my crush. The upside of the whole thing is now I remember what it's like to feel that way. I would love to find that with an unattached person. I'm still getting the random flashes in my head (a hand, hair, eyes) that get the heart pumping. Do they make a pad for over active female wetness? They should. I have no doubt now that I wont settle. Hard lesson to learn but gave me the right perspective going forward dating. So glad they live out of town! That would be too painful and hard to heal. All in all the Diva will be okay.

Have a great weekend!

Dating (and life) goes on

Since I last wrote I've been busy. I was communicating with four guys in the online dating site. I went on a date with one last week. He said in his profile he was 5'7" but when I stood up at the end I was taller. I am 5'51/2. There was no chemistry for me. He had mannerisms that were too much like my ex-husband. The guy I went out with yesterday gave up smoking to meet me. Sadly there was no chemistry here either. He has been living in or near the same small town for 30 years and has worked the same job. He does not like his job but work is all he does. At least I'm out there trying. Another has showed via e-mail he is very personally conservative. No can do.

This weekend was Derby Daze. I had signed up to go to the Ref workshops and see how I felt about Derby. Couplesk8 assumed I wanted to Ref. I ran the Penalty box all weekend and for the WoJ bout. It was fun to have Ref's from other leagues as well as girls. The scrimmages were fun to help with on Saturday and Sunday. Met some fun people I hope to stay in touch with. I also met someone that really sparked for me. It isn't often I meet someone that I'm instantly highly attracted to. (twice in the last ten years) I notice mannerisms and certain things I like. I was in full on crush before we even had a conversation. When we did speak there was something there and when we touched it was electric. It wasn't just on my side. All great, right? They live out of state and are married. That really bites. My heart hurts and I cant get them out of my head! Random thoughts pop in my head like their hands (yes, I like hands) and how they move around in a conversation, their voice, (again a voice can be very sexy) eyes, smile, principles and a confident patients and knowledge-FUCK! I'm hooked. Don't think less of them. They did not do anything untowards. We both felt it but did not act on anything. Okay, we had no personal space but it just seemed natural and yes when we touched there was an electricity .God it just hurts. Thankfully they live out of state so I can slowly get over this. It will take time. It would help if I could meet someone else. Anyone know anyone out there that would be perfect for a Diva? Help!

You never know what is coming

I'm pretty psyched today! My period is two weeks early. Do you know what that means?!? I am on the final descent into barren town! I have actually been cold and needed a jacket or something of late. I know I'm not there yet but am very proud of myself and learning some zen-like techniques on coping with the emotional roller coaster. Being able to bike has really helped tremendously! Not only the weight loss and muscle tone but it truly takes the anxiety edge away. The final thing I have to do is go inward and talk and breath myself through some intense emotions. I have learned to keep them in and let them rage to fizzle out but not spew forward at people. My hope in (over) sharing my experiences it might help another.

Go forward and enjoy! I'm going to bike instead of clean (again)

My life

Having a wonderful time with the Aunties! They are a fun loving bunch of ladies. I have gotten to know them a bit this summer. I even given them all nick names. They love it.

Finally a real update on dating. I have four dudes in open communication right now. I think I scared one away when he seemed personally conservative. The fourth fellow just went to open communication so we will start e-mailing and getting to know each other. I have one date on Wednesday at a happy hour. I'm trying to fit in another fellow this week but he works days this week and I am evenings. My only day is Tuesday but I already invited my dad for pizza and a movie. Other dude took my day off. Dad is a "maybe" so if he cancels I can meet the other dude. I would go for a quick bike ride either way. It seems to get the blood going and then I'm good til 9pm or later. If I don't do a ride I'm cross-eyed tired!

The thing is I'm not thrilled with any of these guys. I don't know if it's not meeting face to face yet or what. Stay tuned.

August 6th a day in history

Well, a Diva was born on this day in 1962. Some other awesomely creative and important folks share this Birthday with Me. Andy Warhol, Odie (Garfield's dog) Lucille Ball, 1881 - Alexander Fleming Scottish scientist, Nobel laureate (d. 1955) who discovered penicillinand in

1972 - Geri Halliwell, British singer a.k.a. Ginger Spice of the pop band Spice Girls. History on August 6th

• 1806: Holy Roman empire officially ends
• 1915: During World War I, Warsaw falls into German hands
• 1945: Atomic bomb dropped Hiroshima
• 1962: Jamaica gains independent from Britain

1965 The Voting Rights Act becomes law in the USA, making illegal the southern states' practice of disenfranchising black voters by imposing taxation, literacy, or other requirements on potential voters
1996 The royal family opens Buckingham Palace, London, England, to the general public. Visitors pay £8 a head.

And finally some words by the Man himself:

The Man himself

Finally, about Leo the zodiac sign. Seems to fit me.

Last night one of the Pharmacist brought a chocolate cake and a lemon tart to celebrate not only my birthday but another Pharmacist who has the same birthday. She brought it last night since I was not working tonight. A co-worker friend that cant come tonight since she is working suggested pizza to split. It was a good night at work.

Today is turning out better than I had planned. I had a general plan but as things have morphed I am pleased! After lunch at my parents we are coming back here and popping some sparkling wine before heading out into FT. Another friend from work (movie buddy) is coming here to sip before we go play. A few folks might meet up along the way. I know it was short notice so I'm not expecting many to show. It will be more birthday surprises.

First Thursday August 6

This Thursday I will be celebrating in the Pearl at First Thursday. In the Summer it's quite fun filled with Art Galleries staying open late, Artist in the street and vendors. There is also the Farmer's Market in Jaimeson Square that goes until 7:30 pm. I love First Thursday in the Summer as it is like a neighborhood street fair! Oh, and it's my Birthday. Come play with me in the Pearl.

RSVP if you want game plan/meet up and my number if you don't already have it.

Pearl Dist. Gallery and walking map

and some commentary

On the Dating front

Things have not progressed much with the online dating. I had it in my head that once you sign up you are dating. (Welcome to Marta's World) Not the case. Not much was happening even tho I had not closed all matches and even sent some "ice breakers". I am surprised that I got no response back from several. Why are you paying for this site? I took the "bull by the horns" and started communicating (not ice breakers tho I had already sent some) with any matches that looked okay and by looked I mean profile and photo. Out of 12 guys 5 have closed the match, 1 has responded to my first set of questions and then sent me a set. Yesterday a match asked to open communication with me. He has been "sitting" in my "matches" box for two or three days idle. I was not excited by him so I just let him sit. Hey, I didn't just close him! The interesting things about him is he is Japanese but 6'2'', he is interested in some of the same things as me but lives in a far out suburban area. I am enjoying my urban world and have no desire to go suburban anytime soon.

I recently spoke with a co-worker that used e-Harmony. She just got married last month. I asked her about her experience with the online dating. She told me some interesting facts about her time on e-Harmony. She said that she used e-Harmony on and off for two years. TWO YEARS! The other thing she told me is after her an now husband got serious they counted up how many matches they had. She had over 200 matches before she met her man. He had a year and about one hundred matches. Wow. Others out there is this typical? What was/is your experience?

In one of the profiles of a new match he says something I don't get. "A friend that taught me to use my brain and think for myself. and can be found at Jamesbondaka at the y place....do you get it?" WTF? I googled it and got a My Space page. I don't get it. Anyone get it?

Lastly, I have spent some free brain time thinking back over relationships. I have taken some time contacting a few to say things I never got the chance to say. I felt it was important for me. Maybe they will get something out of it too. I'm not trying to get back with them. I just want closure or clear up a misunderstanding. I've done my part.

Do you think it's tacky to use your wedding photo as your profile picture on a dating website? Imagine this a guy in a tux in front of a church door with a bride in a poofy white lace dress holding white roses (that match your boutonniere on your tux) mostly photo shopped out. Sincerely.